Accepting Pain
We are all familiar with the bona fide quotes…. “No Pain, No Gain”
No Growth in Comfort”. Wise words indeed, but do we really need to suffer to grow?
Before you continue to read…stop. Take a few minutes to ponder and reflect on your past.
And in this instance (for the purpose of this article ) recall your greatest achievements. It may help to jot them down on a notepad.
I bet the vast majority (if not all ) that you have recalled will have been extremely laborious and painful both on a physiological and psychological level. Rewards for the grind !
This article is not about me but to give some basis to my opinions I will impart some of my own experiences with pain, mentally and physically.
If I was to write this article ten years ago I would have said that I experienced a great deal of pain and suffering. As I reflect now it was no more than a bump on the road of my journey. In fact I have experienced a lot more since and all of it (without exception) has allowed me to go to a higher level of consciousness.
After all -our experience of suffering are in sync with our own immediate perceptions.
Going back to college after many years to study anatomy and physiology. Training twice a day, five days a week to achieve grades in various martial arts. Having to make lots of sacrifices to save €30,000 for a deposit to buy my first home. Working 14 hour days to build a business..All good. But how about the things we have no control over. Spending weeks in hospital and over two years of rehab rebuilding my knees. Deaths, accidents and evilness. And more personal issues that will remain personal.
In comparison little to worry about there.
I remember reading about a man who literally lost everything through natural disaster. Family, friends, home and all his possessions.
With these great losses this man also lost his identity, his reputation and some of his physical abilities. What he had identified with had been taken away. After some time of deep grievance, fear and feelings of desperation this gave way to a sacred sense of peace and complete freedom from fear. I struggled to understand this until I researched it deeper and delved into uncomfortable introspection.
When we begin to understand the ego and how it works the answers become clear.
All suffering, be it self inflicted or involuntary will allow us to grow. Think of yourself with nothing, no job, no partner, no car, no reputation. When you have nothing to identify with who are you? Are you a different person in different company? Are you a different person on Facebook? Do you give as much time to the homeless man as you do to the Hollywood celebrity?
The ego has a massive appetite, there are many ways we can starve it, however ,I believe the most erosive of all, is how you react when under extreme pressure.
What comes out when you are pressed? If someone undermines you , berates you or antagonizes you. How do you react? Do you overcome it with love or batter it in to submission with ego infused anger? The key is never to allow yourself to be undermined or antagonized….the rub is how?
There are many methods and techniques but all involve starving the ego first. This is achieved by becoming conscious to negative thoughts manifesting when under pressure.
We can not give what we don’t have. To give love, we must first have an endless supply.
We can only reap what we sow. I was delivering a seminar recently and spoke in depth about ’cause and effect’. I spoke to a young man after the seminar. During my speech he felt the need to say out loud so everyone In the room could hear him “I don’t believe in all that hippy drippy nonsense”. Many people were offended by his outburst, I was not. I understood it was his ego screaming to be fed. I chose not to feed what was already obese.
We now meet for regular sessions, his harvest is looking very healthy and his ego is hanging on for dear life!
Accept pain, learn from it, it will only disappear when it teaches you all you need to know.
Aidan Carroll